Kutcher as a model in 1998.
Alix Malka/Corbis Sygma

Ok, so we did snicker a little (make that snort in an un-ladylike fashion that frightened our coworkers) ) when we first saw former That 70's Show star, Ashton Kutcher, 28, sitting primly with his wife, Demi Moore in the front row during Fall Fashion Week, intently taking notes as each model sashayed down the runway. Was our boy Kelso really that whipped for his wife, or was there something more nefarious afoot?

Turns out the one-time model turned actor was hard at work penning a column for the January issue of Harper's Bazaar wherein he rhapsodizes about finding a balance between haute couture and pigskin.

“It’s 9:11 pm on the evening of 9/11, and Marc Jacobs’s first look hits the runway one hour and 11 fashionable minutes late. Trust me, that’s exact. I know because I am counting the seconds until I can get home and catch the end of the year’s first Monday Night Football game. (The odd thing is it seems as if I am the only one here who is aware we are missing it.)"

Of course, no matter how many designer suits and clear manicures you pawn off on a man, Kutcher readily admits there's one aspect of fashion that he'll never grasp -- answering his wife when she asks, "How do I look?"

“I can explain the Pythagorean theorem. I can break down the elements of the periodic table by atomic weight. I can tell you what year the Bears won the Super Bowl and name all the Great Lakes-Huron, Ontario, Michigan, Erie, Superior. But this is the most treacherous question known to man.”

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